Art Imitating Life

Have you ever read the Manga BAKUMAN?  I'm recommending it to everyone I know (even "mundanes") because, even if you only think of Manga as those weird backwards-reading graphic novels with people with giant eyes, BAKUMAN might be a good one to try because, IMHO, it's much more accessible to anyone--though specifically people who want to be writers. 

BAKUMAN starts as the story of two young Japanese middle school boys who dream of publishing their own Manga.  It's a slow enough process that they don't really start to realize this dream until they're graduated from high school.  But, what I love most about the story is how both realistic it is to the publishing industry (with allowances for some cultural/genre differences) and how deeply inspirational it is.

Deeply inspirational.

What's so inspirational about it, you ask?  Well, for one, our heroes get a boatload of rejections.  Every time they get ahead a step they get knocked back two.  They get series placed in Shonen Jump only to watch it fail miserably.  They do this again and again and again and, here's the important bit: THEY NEVER GIVE UP. 

In my opinion, that's the only true way to survive as a working writer.

I got another proposal rejected yesterday. 

I could cry about it, but I'm actually kind of pumped to get back in the saddle and try out another, BETTER idea.  Having that thought made me feel like I was a character in BAKUMAN.  In a very Japanese moment, when I got the rejection notice from my agent, I felt like writing back and hitting the all-caps to shout that I'll "do my best!" (which I swear someone yells in every single Manga I've ever read) on the next attempt. 

So I'm off to DO MY BEST today.  Wish me luck!

The Fraud Phenomenon

I had a very, uh, "interesting" time (as we like to say here in Minnesota) at WorldCON this year.  I spent a lot of the con feeling like a complete fraud, partly because of the nature of being a writer and because of the star-power that WorldCON attracts. 

Many years ago, I was on a panel at a different convention, WisCON, about the phenomenon of "feeling like a fraud" that a surprising number of writers experience at all levels in their careers. 

Of course, there's the "I haven't published anything yet, I feel like a fraud" problem, which I was reminded at this convention because my friend Naomi and I had a terrible Baltimore WorldCON when we were in that position.  It involved always feeling one step behind all the cool kids, and a crazy story in which we were escorted out of the Hugo Losers' Party feeling like the biggest losers on the entire planet (we weren't trying to crash the party, honest!  We were locked in the stair well.)

Then, there's the next step on the fraud ladder: "I've ONLY published [one short story, one small press novel, etc.], I feel like a fraud."  This is also kind of just a stage in your career, but a lot of people have a harder time here than in almost any other.  There's a lot of judging by others at this stage.  You're active enough in the business to get ON panels, but then you have to sit there will people who rattle off a list of accomplishments a mile long and, with each one, you feel smaller and smaller and smaller.  This can actually happen at any stage.  When I'd had my first book out, I had the pleasure/misfortune of being on a panel at CONvergence with Neil Gaiman. It's difficult not to feel like a turd at the foot of a giant in a situation like that.  He, of course (like many other super-pros), was massively gracious.  But, sometimes you run across those who sneer, "Oh, I see, small press..." etc. 

Fraudness continues as you move up, no matter how much you publish or how many awards you win....

In fact, what's tough about the "feeling like a fraud" phenomenon is that Neil Gaiman probably feels it, too, sometimes.  I know that, after fifteen published novels, I really should have no cause to feel like a fraud, but I still do.  This has a lot to do with the nature of our business.  As soon as the contract ends (and often long before the book hits the shelf) a person can feel like an out-of-work layabout.  If, god forbid, the next contract isn't instantly forthcoming it's VERY EASY to imagine that your career is over, if only because there's always someone you know in this business for whom that happened.  Hence, there's this sense that when I'm not actively writing on a project, I'm some how no longer a "real" writer.

The feeling of not being  a "real" writer was intensified for me at WorldCON because all the luminaries of science fiction/fantasy are there (or at least a whole boatlaod of them, at one point, literally--as I was on a boat with a bunch of much more famous writers.)  Plus, it's *just* outside of my Fandom.  Enough of the Chicago concom folks intermingle with the Minnesota concom types that I got on panels, but most of the people I ran into at WorldCON not only didn't know me from Adam, but also didn't know how to pronounce my name (not Tate, the other one.)  That just left me feeling like a complete dope. 

HOWEVER, I did manage to have a good time.  And, there's a weird thing about me, which is, the more under pressure I feel, the more I perform.  So, feeling like a nobody has actually inspired me to get cracking again.

WorldCON

As part of my "wake up and smell the coffee" plan, I am going to be attending WorldCON in Chicago this year.  I may be there as my alter ego much of the time, but, if you happen to go and would like to see me on a panel or get a book autographed or just say "hi," here's where I'll be:

FRIDAY - 3:00 - 4:30pm --Broad Universe Rapid-Fire Reading

SATURDAY - 10:30am - Noon --Autograph Session
SATURDAY - 16:00 - 17:30 (4:00pm-5:30pm?) --Series: Why Do We Love Them, Why Do we Hate Them? (ooh, I'll have tell Shawn. Jack McDevitt is on the panel with me!)
SATURDAY - 10:30 - 11:00pm (for some reason they switched out of military time) -- Reading: Lyda Morehouse (perhaps Tate wasn't invited? Too bad, I intend to read from Precinct 13.)

SUNDAY - 1:30-3:00pm --Grimm from a Portland Perspective. (A panel I'm probably on because I have Grimm opinions in general, given I don't live in Portland and have no Portland perspectives.)

I am also pleased to say that I will be at several parties, including one that you all are invited to--the Hogwart's Renunion Party.  It's an adult cosplay Harry Potter party, and I dusted off my Slytherin robes and stuffed them into my suitcase.  I'm hoping that will be some fun.  My hair is currently crossplaying Severus Snape, so I guess its geared up, even if I'm still doing the headless chicken thing.

Come on Baby, Light My Fire

I've been absolutely horrible about keeping up here at this blog.  I have to apologize for that.  The truth of the matter is that I've been a bit depressed.  It seems that my publisher isn't interested in more books in the PRECINCT 13 series (or... at least there's been no interest so far.)

In the way of the wheels of publishing, I wrote PRECINCT 13 and turned it in last year.  It came out this August.  Normally, my editor buys the next book almost right away, and I start working on a sequel so that it can come out _next_ year. 

Because my editor hasn't bought the next book, I've actually been "out of work" for almost a year.  I haven't been writing any original fiction at all (I have, alas, written nearly 200,000 words of fan fiction, but that's another story.)  This was a mistake.  It was an honest one, but a mistake all the same.  Had I not trusted that the book contract "would be coming," I could have written and finished any number of dream projects.  But, because I was expecting news of a contract sale "any minute now," I let myself fall into vacation mode.  I doodled around.  I played with fan fic.  I generally didn't do anything to forward my writing career for an entire year. 

I can't afford to do that any more -- not financially, and not emotionally.

So, I'm starting to finally wake up, smell the coffee, and start casting around for various ideas and projects.  One thing I've decided to do is take part in the NaNoWriMo.  I was thinking that one of the things people always say to me is, "Tate, you should write a Garnet Lacey e-book."  I've always sort of nodded politely and not done much about that idea, because I had deadlines to meet.  Also, it's sometimes difficult for me to get excited about something that no publisher is waiting for.  However, it feels like November might be the time to get serious about that.  So, I've officially signed up and am planning to spend that time working on a Garnet Lacey e-book.  I'm going to dust off my proposals and see what looks neat.  I'm thinking of this as an opportunity to do some things that the publisher would never have gone for -- maybe Garnet will have a secret affair with Parrish (maybe there will be a three-way!)  Who knows?  The cool thing is that, for once, there are no limits.  I'm really hoping to enjoy the process and revisiting old friends.  But, if you have anything you'd like to see in an e-book, now is the time to tell me.  I'm going to start jotting down ideas in my NaNoWriMo notebook! 

I am also planning on tracking my progress with this and other projects here on my blog.  So, I hope you'll stop by now and again to cheer me on.  I'm sorry I've been away, but it's good to be back.

Reviews!

Reviews are starting to roll in for PRECINCT 13.

Here's one from Smexy Books: http://smexybooks.com/2012/08/review-precinct-13-by-tate-hallaway.html

And Seeing Night: http://seeingnight.blogspot.com/2012/08/review-of-precinct-13-by-tate-hallaway.html

I was particularly pleased with the second one because it seems clear that the readers are sensing just how much FUN I had writing this book, and it makes me happy.

The Old Becomes New Again

I've been announcing this everywhere, so I figure I should let those who check in at the blog know as well: AngeLINK Series to Come Out in E-Book Format (Finally!) My friend and colleague Cheryl Morgan of Wizard's Tower Press and I just signed a contract to make this possible. I'm SUPER excited, too. Bruce Jensen, the artist of the original covers, has also volunteered their use for the e-reprints and (as a bonus) will be revealing BRAND-NEW, never before seen art for the fourth book in the trilogy, Apocalypse Array.

Pretty (bleeping) awesome, right?

CON This Year

I wrote a condensed con report for CONvergence on my LJ account. But, I know many of you can't access that easily, so I shall reprint it for you in full below.

Also, for this blog, I should add that CONvergence is one of the largest local (St. Paul/Minneapolis) area conventions, and possibly one of the largest anywhere (if you discount media cons like ComiCon).  There were 6,000 people in attendence.  I was also there, officially, as Lyda Morehouse (my alter ego), though Tate Hallway did make several rather memorable appearances....

---------

I can't even begin to express all the amazing that was CON this year. I had So. Much. Fun.

I also think that I may have made a dildo reference with Tamora Pierce, which is just...awkward. In fact, I'm fairly certain that when/if I get the CONvergence DVD, I'm probably going to be pretty horrified by some of the things that came out of my mouth. This is the only drawback to having caffiene as my drug of choice. Too much coffee can make me stupid (usually funny, but sometimes only because I'm willing to say something no one really should have. EVER.) Also, I think this problem can be summed up by the fact that the single most retweeted line of mine involved me saying, "OMG, I got so much money for that short story; wait, let me take my clothes off." (Which makes no sense out of context, but kind of shows you the state of my over-caffinated brain.)

I met some amazing people who talked me into having a fan twitter account, so I now have Yet Another Secret Identity to keep track of, but, much to my complete surprise, I kind of like Twitter in small doses. It's so much easier to follow seven people than seventy.

Oh, and I'm pretty sure I failed the secret pro party. For one, I invited fans. Our squeeling scared off all the boys, but I also feel bad that my friends LJ-naomikritzer and LJ-jiawen probably ended up feeling left out as well. I did have a couple of panels from hell, which I should recount at some point in great and grisly detail but the gist of both of them can be summed up thusly: TOO MUCH TESTOSTERONE and OMG-at-least-read-the-genre-you're-bashing-or-I-will-go-commando-on-your-a$$.

In general, if I had a thinky-thought about CONvergence this year it is to wonder if there was a little blowback (as it were) towards women and womanly-things thanks to the theme, which was "Women of Wonder."

Now, sadly I must return to the Real Life (tm). What a let down! For one, I have no minion (yes, I got a minion as a perk of being of Guest of Honor,) and, thus, no one to fetch me things and/or generally take care of MY needs. I'm now back to caring for others and doing the dishes.

*sigh*

CON Schedule

I will be at CONvergence starting tomorrow.  If you'd like to see me (or witness my strange time-traveling hair), come down and check me out.  My schedule can be found here.

Romantic Times Review

4 STARS!

Hallaway kicks off a fun new series featuring a young woman who learns that, despite what she's been told, she's not crazy. Hallaway is known for combining the weird and wacky with an element of danger -- and this latest offering is no exception. A terrific starting point for a series and a set of characters that promise to be very intreguing.

Yipee!

Boys and Books

Mason is currently reading a book called BLOODY JACK: A Curious Tale of the Adventures of Mary "Jackie" Faber, A Ship's Boy by L.A. Meyer. He's positively giddy about this story which is about a kick-butt, cross-dressing girl in the British navy during the time of pirates. I'm always pleased at the extent to which the gender of the story means absolutely NOTHING to Mason. He'll read any book that interests him, and completely defies that old publishing adage that boys will only read stories with boy heros.

In fact, one of his favorite series was the DEAR DUMB DIARY books which are about a girl, Jamie, who has a whole lot of boy trouble in middle school. Those books are also really hillarious and written, interestingly, by a man.

The one area in which his reading tastes run more "boy" is when it comes down to a preferrence between Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys. We have far more Hardy Boys in the house than Nancy Drew, but, I have a feeling that once he's torn through all those Hardy Boys, Nancy will look a lot more interesting. :-)

I'm not sure what I'm trying to say about this except that I think it's amazingly damaging to keep insisting that boys need boy heros. I'm all for more girl-power books (and if this belief is the only thing fueling all those books, well then I'll put up with it,) but I think that boys will read those too, if given a chance. Certainly my boy will. If the story is good, he's there.

When I mentioned this on Facebook my friend and middle-grade writer Kurtis Scaletta suggested that boys will read books about friendships and romance "in SECRET." I told him that I hope that the e-reader can do for young boys what it's done for erotica and the middle-aged woman, which is to say, make reading whatever the hell they like less "shameful" since no one can judge the e-reader by its cover, as it were.

I'll Be Takin' That All the Way to the Bank, Haters!

Despite my bravado, I was feeling a bit down after reading the hateful review yesterday. Thus, the universe interceeded on my behalf. First, I had a lovely time hanging out at a coffeeshop with a friend in which she nearly convinced me of the merits of writing fanfic in my own universe (it could happen.) Regardless, we had an excellent time chatting about Minicon and fangirliness.

Then a royalty check arrived in the mail.

The very best revenge, my friends, is living well.

The Confidence Game

I've been thinking about amount of sheer chutzpah being a writer requires a lot lately.

First, in my Loft class, I was having a chat (I'm teaching on-line this year, which probably deserves a post all its own,) and one of the students was talking about how difficult it is to work up the courage to send stories to magazines. I get this. In fact, this is one of the reasons I have offered to do this part of the job for several members of the writers' group. Yet, I've never had a lot of trouble with it myself. I have what my martial arts instructors call an indomitable spirit. I don't believe I'm awesome so much as I believe that you can't win if you don't play. I'm always willing to wade in and get knocked out. Then, I get up and do it again. I get pounded a lot, but I've got a smile on my face because, to me, this is part of what it means to be a writer. Being engaged in the business, even if it bloodies your lip.

And it will.

A lot.

Because, even AFTER you've punched your way over the transom and into publication, you still get really nasty reviews. Even ten years after a book comes out, you might stumble across something that points out all the weaknesses you always secretly knew you had.

The hardest is part of being a writer is how utterly vulnerable you have to be willing to be while also maintaining a ridiculously thick skin. It's a really strange requirement, but I think one of the ones we really have to develop if we want to survive.

Once more into the breech! Let us ride out to meet them!

Because it's all about me!

Here's me, on Heidi's "Pick Six" talking about myself and, of course, my latest Anime obsession: http://heidirubymiller.blogspot.com/2012/03/heidis-pick-six-tate-hallaway.html. Enjoy!

The All about Me Show

Here's the link to the .mp3 archived file of my "Write On Radio" show, http://www.kfai.org/node/42318 in which I talk about (and read from) the newest book, ALMOST EVERYTHING, discuss a few plot spoilers, and spend a long time critiquing my response to THE HUNGER GAMES.

"Write On," Baby!

I'll be one of the guests on tomorrow night's (Tuesday, March 6) "Write On! Radio" show on KFAI. You can catch me by tuning into 90.3 FM/Minneapolis or 106.7 FM/St. Paul from 7:00 pm to 8:00 pm. Or, it's available streaming at: http://www.kfai.org/writeonradio.

If you can't catch it live, the show is usually archived within 24 hours. I'll be sure to post a link once it's up.

I'll be talking, among other things, a bit about the newest (and, sadly, last) Ana book, ALMOST FINAL CURTAIN.

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone. To make my day brighter, Google alerted me to this lovely review of ALMOST EVERYTHING on CA's blog.

Released into the Wild...!

So today is a big day for Ana Parker... the third and final installment of the Vampire Princess of St. Paul book is out! Run and find out what new adventures await her, Elias, Nikolai and all the others!

Weekend Plans?

If you have none, please feel free to stop by Uncle Hugo's from 1:00 - 2:00 pm where I will be signing Tate's newest release, ALMOST EVERYTHING, the last of the Vampire Princess of St. Paul books. If you need more info, please check out http://www.unclehugo.com/prod/index.shtml

Hope to see you there!

Friday Shameless Self-Promotion Cat

Wha...? How did SHE sneak in here!!???

Review!

Fresh Fiction has a review of ALMOST EVERYTHING (the last Ana book) up at their site. Check it out!