Today is the first day that Tall, Dark & Dead officially goes on sale.
There was a really wonderful article about MOI, as Ms. Piggy would say, in the Saint Paul Pioneer Press on Sunday. If you're interested, check out: http://www.twincities.com/mld/twincities/entertainment/books.
Can I tell you that I'm completely freaked out by all of this?
I'm trying very, very hard to be excited. There's no reason to think that TDD won't do well, but, I feel a little bit like a formerly abused spouse who's getting married again. This is different, I know that...
BUT. I think I'd be feeling a lot more hopeful if there wasn't a day, five years ago, when I felt so much more exhilaration walking into the nearest Barnes & Noble and finding a copy of my book on the shelves. I was so excited. I took a picture of myself standing next to the aisle like a proud parent.
Today, when I drove out to HarMar Mall with my son in tow, I wasn't at all surprised they didn't have Tall, Dark & Dead in stock. The nice information clerk explained that she figured their shipment had been delayed. "Whatever," I said, and meant it. I mean, I've been through this process enough times to know that no one cares if my books are out ON TIME. Tate Hallaway is not on par with Charlaine Harris, whose fans would have a conniption fit if her newest, which also comes out today, isn't on the shelves.
Also, although my friends are excited about my Amazon.com sales ranking, I keep thinking, "Yes, but for how long?" And, "But, is it enough for what it is – in other words, will NY be disappointed by THE NUMBERS?"
It doesn't help that my agent and I, who are ready to propose more books in the Garnet Lacey universe, were told to wait a few weeks until more sales figures came in. From where I'm sitting, that just smells like doom and gloom.
I wish I could be more optimistic.
The only thing I know for certain is that, if by some chance, this venture should fail, I will keep writing. Last night as I was staying up to write (I wrote an amazing 2,500 words on Dead Sexy, the next Garnet book), my partner turned to me and said, "Hey, I’m really proud of you." And, I knew what she was talking about. It wasn't the fact that I was up writing, or that my book officially came out in an hour (this was at 11 pm), but the fact that when I could have quit, I reinvented myself.
And I’ll do it again if I have to.